The Taj Mahal

This was definitely a step up from the last train trip... it was only 6 hours late this time. We were debating whether we needed a tuker, however we only had a short stay so we grabbed one. Luckily, this guy took us to a cheap hotel. There was an open court in the middle where we would eventually eat dinner. After deciding our course of action for the day, we set off for the Taj Mahal. But first, lunch. We had a young tuker who took us to an oasis in the desert of Agra. Probably the first kept grass ive seen in an Indian city... and no trash!

We even met the tuker's father there, a man who spoke fluent french. One thing i will give credit to Indians for is language. We ran into a lot of people who spoke English very well. Plus, i hear they are doing algebraic math in kindergarten....

After a nice lunch, with chai of course, we made our way to the Taj Mahal. It was too busy for our driver to pull-up near the gate so he parked in some back alley and we had to walk the rest of the way. He warned us of the typical tourist traps that awaited us on the way to the gate. Like we were odysseus making our way past Indian sirens, people selling trinkets, beggars, and pushy cabbies grabbing our arms... When we actually made to the gate we had to buy a ticket, but due to all the shit everywhere we didn't know if this is where we buy a ticket. We double checked the sign that was painted by an 8 year old. Our deciding factor were the guys with guns who pointed towards the stand.

At least India is blatantly racialist by charging a price that is about 100x higher for foreigners (whities). 750 Rps to 25 Rps... this was way over my 10 budget for my whole India trip.

We make our way through another gate and we are greeted by a massive marble structure shining in the distance. We stood there for a few minutes to congeal with this eye candy. We made a way by a filming crew, crazy foreigners, and thousands of Japanese people with nikons strapped to their neck taking pictures... The pathway towards the Taj is deceivingly long. The size of the Taj is like a mirage that you think your getting closer to, but its always a little further.

Halfway, we came along some fountains and snapped some pics. Some Indian gardeners, trimming grass with their sheers, petitioned us to join them in their endeavor. Very well.
Then we noticed this Japanese babe who was wearing a revealing white dress being hounded by tons of Indian men... much to her parents dismay. ha, I think she was constantly getting harassed to let people take a picture with her.

Nearly at the Taj, we had to take our shoes off and place them in a little plastic bag they provided us with. We walked up a few steps to be on the square which housed the Taj Mahal. Freaking sweet... Marble inlaid with semiprecious jewels. Inside were the tombs of the creator and his wife, who he made it for. Pictures weren't allowed but i tried to get a few. They didn't really turn out well because of the lighting. We exited the back were Indians, Muslims, and scores of other nerfherders were lounging around. Somehow, they showed some restraint and didn't piss on the Taj. We couldn't say the same for the band of monkeys that lived off to the side.

I think they were having a monkey war... they would chase each other up the side of the bu idling, around the side, and then up a tree to continue this process again. Tim decided to get brave and actually poke a giant monkey with equally giant nuts. Unexpectedly, he didn't get his face mauled off. We finished off the Taj by walking around taking some other pictures. And, shiiit, done dropped my camera on the sidewalk... the camera I was borrowing from my coworker. Tim just laughs as I crap myself and pray it still works. Luckily, only a few superficial scratches adorn it like a badge of honor that silently says 'I've been to India.'









Response: The train ride was pretty nice, but after the last couple ones, the train would have had to literally derail to get any worse. As we arrive in Agra, I basically bare knuckle box Hahn right outside the train station to not get a tuker, as we start walking in the direction of the hostel/hotel we want to stay at. Sure as shit though, we get followed by a pack of ravenous drivers, all wanting to drive us. We don't even get a block from the train station and Hahn caves in, and before I can take my pack off to beat him with it, he's in the taxi. Wanker. So our tuker takes us into town, and we get into a decent resting place whose highlight is a cable tv (with channels play music videos and commercials all day and night) and a nice courtyard sitting area that also serves food. We would eat there later, and it was quite pleasant. Anyway, we head to the Taj, and its chaos as usual. There is much more to explain that Tim already hasn't other then then fact that for locals it was basically free, for everyone else it was something like 75 dollars...what a fucking rip off...Im not even sure why I keep writing that about India. So we buy our ticket, head past all the guards with soviet era machine guns, and watch all the tourists scurry about the grounds. The Taj Mahal was impressive by any means, although you did not really get to get to far inside. Most of it was roped off, or the doors just locked. Hahn and I got our picture taken with a ton of locals, and headed off to the right to check out some other buildings...and then came the monkeys. Those fearless bastards. I look up, and here comes this giant male monkey walking down the top of the wall, heading right for me. This thing has three options. Turn around, and head back wherever it came from. Jump off the wall (its a 30 foot drop...probably not the best option).



Or walk by me....So it just keeps on walking right for me, like I didn't exist. So as he passes me, less then a foot away, I slap it on the ass. Nothing. Didn't flinch. It walks another 20 feet on the wall, and then bungees into a tree, and then joins the monkey war down on the ground on the other side. More important things to do I guess. So yeah, Hahn and I get some more pictures taken with locals who've never seen white boys before, and I take some pictures of graffiti strewn throughout the buildings.




Afterwards we head to a couple other places, a small cleared out cropping across the river from the Taj, and a handful of other monuments, complete with kids jumping off a wall into a river (only to then ask for money...of course...because they jumped into the river). As the day turned to night, we decided to pretty much take the night off, as we had early tickets to Jaipur. We would need the rest.